Lately I've been drawn to work on the area of gentleness. This verse in particular has been standing out to me:
Ephesians 4:2 "Let your gentleness be evident to all. The Lord is near."
It is often easier to be objective with other people's children than with my own, it seems. Gentleness has never been a strength of mine, but Colossians 3:12-14 defines it as a necessary character trait of anyone who would be God's:
"Therefore, as God's chosen people, holy and dearly loved, clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience. Bear with each other and forgive whatever grievances you may have against one another. Forgive as the Lord forgave you. And over all these virtues put on love, which binds them all together in perfect unity." So if gentleness should be evident to all... that includes my own children.
It's so easy to get caught up in meeting goals I have for myself and for my household and I forget the more important intangible ones I have for our children's development of character- which is largely learned by example. Even good goals like having a clean house, timely supper and schoolwork finished, when made the primary focus of being home with my children instead of the more important role of discipling them to be like Christ through the classroom of life that includes those household chores- things are unbalanced and gentleness is left as I rush to take hold of the habitually comfortable trophy of "finished work" over a teaching moment.
Something I am learning from the Filipino culture at church is their extreme love and gentleness with their children. Sometimes this is taken to the level of not having much expected from them and lax discipline in many areas, (and I realize that balance is needed on both ends of this spectrum!) but I haven't been around this child-friendly of a culture before. It has made me think of my own expectations that I have for my children... and realize that many times I am holding them to the same unfair standards that I have for myself. Perfection isn't possible, especially when you're still learning and there are enough fair expectations that are hard enough to fulfill!. It seems to me that the fruits of the spirit (Galatians 5:22-23 "But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control.") are all counter natural reflexes and that Godly balance is key...
God has such a compassionate way of tugging us in the right direction when He has every right to be harsh. I don't understand, but I'm grateful for the way He uses life and people around me to gently teach me when I'm willing to listen.
Lord, help me listen and learn.
Ephesians 4:2 "Let your gentleness be evident to all. The Lord is near."
It is often easier to be objective with other people's children than with my own, it seems. Gentleness has never been a strength of mine, but Colossians 3:12-14 defines it as a necessary character trait of anyone who would be God's:
"Therefore, as God's chosen people, holy and dearly loved, clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience. Bear with each other and forgive whatever grievances you may have against one another. Forgive as the Lord forgave you. And over all these virtues put on love, which binds them all together in perfect unity." So if gentleness should be evident to all... that includes my own children.
It's so easy to get caught up in meeting goals I have for myself and for my household and I forget the more important intangible ones I have for our children's development of character- which is largely learned by example. Even good goals like having a clean house, timely supper and schoolwork finished, when made the primary focus of being home with my children instead of the more important role of discipling them to be like Christ through the classroom of life that includes those household chores- things are unbalanced and gentleness is left as I rush to take hold of the habitually comfortable trophy of "finished work" over a teaching moment.
Something I am learning from the Filipino culture at church is their extreme love and gentleness with their children. Sometimes this is taken to the level of not having much expected from them and lax discipline in many areas, (and I realize that balance is needed on both ends of this spectrum!) but I haven't been around this child-friendly of a culture before. It has made me think of my own expectations that I have for my children... and realize that many times I am holding them to the same unfair standards that I have for myself. Perfection isn't possible, especially when you're still learning and there are enough fair expectations that are hard enough to fulfill!. It seems to me that the fruits of the spirit (Galatians 5:22-23 "But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control.") are all counter natural reflexes and that Godly balance is key...
God has such a compassionate way of tugging us in the right direction when He has every right to be harsh. I don't understand, but I'm grateful for the way He uses life and people around me to gently teach me when I'm willing to listen.
Lord, help me listen and learn.
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