Living in limbo
is a half-packed suitcase
and a never fully-decided
wardrobe.

Living in limbo
is friendship-
not quite followed through
so no one is left in the lurch.

Living in limbo
is seizing the opportunity
of the moment before
both you and it are gone.

Living in limbo
is hovering between
the present and the future:
unable to pause, unable to fast forward.

Living in limbo
is a gift of growing time
before being drawn
into a new routine.

Growing up hearing the words "God loves you" doesn't automatically translate into believing those words. Sometimes those are just words that bounce off of our consciousness and out into the never realized part of our brains... unless really felt and experienced.

Only recently have I, after a long time of not, felt like God loved me. Maybe it's from being separated from my emotions in order to survive from around the time of my miscarriage... maybe it's just that I'm flawed and expect Him to be like me, I don't know. I just know that I was lying in bed praying as I nursed my baby like I do when it's bedtime and for the first time in a long time I felt really loved by God. Does this mean I wasn't before? No. But it's reassuring to feel it sometimes.

Not long after this experience, I got my kids a scripture lullaby CD (volume 1 & 2) because they fall asleep better with music and I prefer the music to be uplifting, since music is easily remembered. As I was listening to the words, this really struck my heart: "You're not here by chance, you are My design, I did well to give you life" It reinforced the feeling of being loved, with something more. Sometimes I think I'm so imperfect that, yes, He loves, but surely with reservations and certainly He couldn't love me with pride! But He does. And it's humbling. And He wants us to love each other the same way He loves us... which, once experienced, makes you understand why.

Here is the scripture lullaby with it's references:

Psalm 139:14
"...I am fearfully and wonderfully made; Wonderful are Your works, Andy my soul knows it very well." NASB

Psalm 23:6
"Surely goodness and mercy shall follow me All the days of my life; And I will dwell in the house of the LORD forever." NKJV

Genesis 1:27

"So God created man in His own image; in the image of God He created him; male and female He created them." NKJV

God's song to you, His child, His creation...

"Looking out into the night sky
A million stars shining down and
I can see how you'd feel so small
Don't forget I'm your Creator
You are Mine and I adore you
Nothing else moves my heart like you
You're not here by chance, you are My design
I did well to give you life

You are fearfully and wonderfully made
Long before you drew your first breath
I knew your name
Surely goodness and mercy
Will follow you forever
For you are fearfully and wonderfully made

Looking deep into your eyes
you're beautiful, like no one else
I smile when I think about your face
you were made in My own image
Carefully, My love would finish
Forming you into who you are
I won't let you go, I'm here with you always
I'll watch you grow strong because I know

You are fearfully and wonderfully made
Long before you drew your first breath
I knew your name
Surely goodness and mercy
Will follow you forever
For you are fearfully and wonderfully made"